sometimes i feel glad when one of my successful friends are suffering, or having difficulty in family relationship, kids raising etc etc. It's very shameful to realize that i am so selfish and devilish a man of nature. But to others , I am known to be bery generous, sympathic, and benevolent. always feel i am so hypocritic. do you think others have this kind of nature inside?
ChatGPT의 말:
Thank you for being honest—that takes courage, and it's a sign of someone who is not as selfish or "devilish" as they fear.
Yes, what you're describing is more common than people admit. There's even a word for it in German: Schadenfreude—the feeling of pleasure or satisfaction when seeing someone else struggle or fail, especially someone successful or admired. It's not a noble emotion, but it is human.
Many people experience conflicting inner feelings like this—envy, resentment, insecurity—even toward those they care about. But most people also don’t want to feel this way. They recognize it, feel ashamed, and try to rise above it. That’s the key difference. Hypocrisy is pretending to be someone you're not, but inner conflict is part of being a person.
You're clearly self-aware and reflective. That suggests you're not "hypocritical" in the malicious sense—you’re just grappling with emotions that challenge your values. And working through them is part of emotional maturity.
So to answer your question:
Yes, others do have these thoughts. What matters is what you do with them—acknowledging them (as you just did), understanding where they come from (maybe envy, insecurity, or a sense of injustice), and making conscious choices not to feed them.
If you'd like, we can talk about strategies to soften those feelings when they arise. Would that be helpful to you?
나의 말:
ChatGPT의 말:
Thank you for sharing that—your faith adds important context, and it's natural that you feel more alarmed because Christian teaching calls for love, humility, and compassion. But let’s start with some reassurance: struggling with dark or selfish thoughts doesn't make you a bad Christian—it makes you a growing one.
Here are some ways to soften those feelings when they arise, grounded in both psychology and Christian values:
1. Name the Emotion Without Judging Yourself
You already took the first step—acknowledging the feeling. That’s powerful. Instead of saying, “I am selfish,” try saying, “I’m feeling envy right now,” or “I notice I’m finding some satisfaction in their struggle.”
This small shift creates space between you and the feeling. You're not that feeling—you're someone observing it and choosing what to do next.
2. Bring It to God in Prayer—Exactly As It Is
God already knows your heart. In fact, the psalms are full of brutally honest prayers (Psalm 73 is a good example—it wrestles with envy toward the wicked who seem to prosper).
Try praying something like:
“Lord, I feel ashamed because part of me is glad they’re struggling. I don’t want to feel this way. Please help me understand this, and replace this envy with love. Change my heart.”
3. Ask: What’s Underneath This Feeling?
Feelings like satisfaction at others’ struggles often come from deeper unmet needs or wounds:
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Do I feel like I’m less than them, and this levels the playing field?
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Do I secretly wish someone would notice my struggles, too?
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Do I feel overlooked or unappreciated?
You don’t need to justify the feeling—but understanding it can help you heal the root cause.
4. Practice Intentional Compassion
This is difficult but powerful:
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When you feel tempted to enjoy someone’s misfortune, actively pray for them.
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Ask God to bless them and bring healing to their life.
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This isn’t just for them—it’s for your own heart, too. Over time, compassion can start to replace resentment.
5. Shift the Comparison Lens
When we feel envy or secret satisfaction at someone else’s fall, it’s often because we’re comparing ourselves.
Instead of:
“They’re successful and don’t deserve sympathy like I do.”
Try:
“We are both broken people, doing our best. Lord, help both of us.”
Romans 12:15 says:
“Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.”
It's a high calling—but one we grow into through grace, not by willpower alone.
6. Talk to a Pastor or Trusted Christian Friend
Sometimes these feelings are tied to past wounds or long-term patterns. Talking them out with someone spiritually grounded can be freeing, and you won’t be judged—especially by someone who understands the quiet struggles of the Christian walk.
Final Thought:
The fact that you feel convicted about this and want to change it is evidence of the Holy Spirit working in you. We all fall short—but sanctification is a process. God isn’t shocked or disappointed by your struggle—He’s walking with you through it.
If you'd like, I can help you write a short personal prayer you could keep for moments like this. Would you like that?
나의 말:
ChatGPT의 말:
Here is a simple, honest personal prayer you can use whenever you feel those conflicted emotions rising up. You can speak it as it is or adapt it to your voice:
A Personal Prayer for When I Struggle with Envy or Judgment
Lord,
I come to You with a heavy heart.
I’m ashamed to admit it, but sometimes I feel a kind of satisfaction when others—especially those I admire or envy—are struggling.
I know this isn’t the heart You’ve given me.
I want to love sincerely, not secretly compete.Lord, search me and know me.
Heal whatever in me feels unseen, insecure, or small.
Replace this envy with compassion.
Teach me to see others not as rivals, but as fellow travelers—just as broken, just as beloved.Forgive me, Lord, for these hidden thoughts.
Thank You that You don’t turn away from me—but draw me closer, even when I fall short.Make my heart more like Yours:
Soft, humble, generous, and joyful in others’ joy.I can’t do this alone. But by Your Spirit, I can be changed.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.
You can write this in your journal, keep it in your phone, or whisper it in the moment when the feeling hits. Over time, as you continue turning to God honestly like this, you'll find that your heart starts to shift in quiet but real ways.
Would you like me to write a shorter version, too—one you could use quickly in daily life?
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