친구가 파킨슨 병인데 교회는 버스타고 1km쯤 걸어서 열심히 다니나 후각 미각이 닫혀있고 집근처에서 맨발걷기를 하려해도 허리가 아파 쉽게 하지 못한다고 하며 의욕이 떨어져 우울증도 느껴진다고 하네요. 오늘 교회에서 점심을 먹으면서도 맛 보다고 때가 되니 먹는것이다라고 하니 안타갑습니다. 드럼이나 기타, pc게임 등 무엇이든 재미있을 것을 찾아보면 의욕이 생기지 않을까 생각되는데 좋은 방법이 없을까요? 파킨슨이 이렇게 희망이 없는 병인지 ...제가 작년 말 교회로 인도했는데 정말 안타깝습니다
My friend has Parkinson's disease. He diligently
attends church by taking a bus and walking about a kilometer, but his sense of
smell and taste are impaired. He says he cannot easily walk barefoot near his
home because of back pain, and his motivation has dropped, leading to feelings
of depression. It is heartbreaking to hear him say that even while having lunch
at church today, he was merely tasting the food and eating because it was time.
I wonder if finding something enjoyable—like playing the drums, guitar, or PC
games—might help him regain his motivation. Is there any good way to help? I
wonder if Parkinson's is really such a hopeless disease... I led him to church
late last year, and it is truly heartbreaking.
It is an unfortunate situation. However,
there is one thing we should clarify.
Parkinson's disease is not a hopeless
illness.
While a complete cure is difficult, it is
closer to a "managed disease" where the quality of life can be
significantly improved through medication, exercise, and lifestyle management.
Your friend's current condition appears to be a typical case where depression
and lethargy (non-motor symptoms) accompany the disease itself, rather than the
disease itself.
Why do these changes occur?
Parkinson's is not simply a "disease
where the body trembles";
👉 It is a disease where a decrease in
dopamine leads to a weakening of the motivation and pleasure circuits
themselves.
Therefore, what your friend mentioned:
"It tastes bland" (decreased sense
of smell/taste)
"I only eat when it is time"
(decreased pleasure)
"I don't want to do anything"
(amotivation)
These are not a lack of willpower, but are
part of the disease.
Helpful Directions (Realistic Approach)
1. What needs to be done before "finding
fun"
Honestly, drums, guitar, games...
👉 In your current state, the
likelihood of finding interest is low. Instead, you must change the order:
① Check medication/medical care →
② Physical movement → ③ Restoration of
pleasure
Medication adjustment at the neurology clinic
(may include dopamine medication or antidepressants)
Depressive symptoms are a subject for
treatment (cannot be resolved by willpower alone)
👉 If this step is skipped, no hobby
will last long.
2. Exercise is the ‘most powerful cure’
Surprisingly, exercise is more important than
medication.
The recommendations are simple:
Brisk walking (within your ability)
Rhythmic exercise (walking to music)
Stretching + back strengthening
If your back hurts:
Flat ground + cushioned shoes rather than
walking barefoot
Swimming / Indoor cycling / Light personal
training
👉 The key is consistency over “intensity” (3-5 times a week)
3. Music is a pretty good choice (with
conditions)
The idea of drums or guitar itself is not bad.
However, you must approach it this way:
Rhythm Therapy, Not a "Hobby"
Start with the simple:
Clapping
Moving hands and feet to a metronome
Following the rhythm of praise songs
👉 For Parkinson's patients, rhythmic
stimulation actually has an effect on improving gait and movement.
4. The Church Is Already a Great Asset
The fact that your friend is currently
attending church is a very important point.
However, you must reduce the burden:
From "hard work" → "comfortable"
From assigning roles → being together
From long journeys → providing assistance by
car if possible
👉 Community connection reduces
depression more than faith itself.
5. The Best Help You Can Provide
What is important here is not "what you
make them do," but how you are together.
Effective Approaches:
Walking together (no words needed)
Eating together (even if the food isn't
great, the 'together' aspect matters)
Setting very small goals
→ “Let’s walk for just 10 minutes today”
Things to Avoid:
“Cheer up,” “Find
some fun”
Comparisons (“Others are doing just fine…”)
👉 Instead, do this:
“Let’s do it
together”
“10 minutes is enough”
Realistic Hope
Although Parkinson’s is a progressive disease:
If you maintain medication + exercise +
social connections well
👉 You can maintain a sufficiently
meaningful life for 10 to 20 years or more.
Rather than
👉 being in a “desperate state because the
disease has worsened”
👉 It is highly likely that your friend
is experiencing early difficulties combined with depression and a lack of
motivation.
Finally,
while the “pity” you feel is natural,
changing your approach just a little will be
much more helpful.
👉 “Let’s find fun” → ❌
👉 “Let’s hang in there together +
get them moving” → ✅
If you wish,
I will also realistically organize specific
daily routines effective for Parkinson’s patients
Ways to naturally help within the church
A checklist for signs of depression
Please.
Okay. Let's not make it too complicated. I
will provide you with a **level that is actually sustainable in your current
state**.
The key is just one thing:
👉 “Little by little, but every day”
1. Daily Routine (Realistic Type)
Created based on a state of having almost no
motivation.
🌅 Morning (Starting the Engine)
5–10 minutes of sunlight (a window seat is OK)
5 minutes of light stretching
5–10 minutes of a short walk if possible
👉 Goal: “Wake up the body” (Starting the engine, not the workout)
🕛 Daytime (Key Time)
Eat regularly, even if it doesn't taste good
10–20 minutes of walking (Most important)
Simple rhythmic activities
Play praise music and clap
Keep your feet to the beat
👉 Goal: Stimulate dopamine + Restore
rhythm
🌆 Afternoon (Sinking Time)
Short nap (under 20 minutes)
1 interaction with people
Phone call / KakaoTalk / Church acquaintance
👉 Goal: Prevent isolation
🌙 Evening (Wrap-up)
Light stretching
TV/YouTube OK (No guilt)
Maintain a consistent sleep schedule
👉 Goal: Create a feeling of “I made it through well”
2. The “3-Step Method” to use when you
lack motivation
This is This is really important.
① “Let’s do it for just 1 minute”
Exercise? → Just walk for 1 minute
Others? → Play hard to get just once
👉 Remove the barrier to starting
② “It’s OK to quit”
👉 Don’t force them to continue
③ “Most
people end up continuing”
👉 Motivation follows action (not the
other way around)
3. How to help within the church (Realistic
type)
Giving them a “religious burden” in this situation is counterproductive.
✔ Good methods
Sitting next to them
Eating together
A simple “See you again next week”
✔ Even better
methods
A small role (something burdensome)
“Shall we tidy up the chairs together?”
“Shall we carry some water together?”
👉 Key: Feeling useful
❌ Things to avoid
“You’ll get
better if you pray”
“Come out more diligently”
“You have to overcome this with faith”
👉 These aren’t wrong, but they are toxic
at this stage.
4. Check for signs of depression (Please make
sure to check this)
This is important. If any of these apply, a
visit to a hospital is recommended.
✔ Nothing brings
joy (for 2 weeks or more)
✔ Changes in
appetite/sleep
✔ Feeling that “life has no meaning”
✔ Almost no
facial expression
✔ Movements have
slowed down
👉 If 2 or 3 or more apply
👉 Consultation with a neurologist and
psychiatrist is recommended
5. The “most powerful help” you can
offer
It doesn’t need to be anything grand.
Just three things:
Walking together
Eating together
Seeing each other briefly and frequently
The power of a single word
Try saying this:
“It’s okay if it’s not fun. Just do it together.”
👉 This phrase provides a tremendous
sense of stability to someone who lacks motivation.
6. Finally (Important Perspective)
Your friend’s current state is
👉 not a “broken state”
👉 but a **“slowed down state”**
Therefore, what is needed is:
Change ❌
Maintenance + Repetition ⭕
If you
wish,
👉
I can naturally create short words of comfort / KakaoTalk messages that you can
send directly to your friend.
I hear
this is happening even though they are receiving medication at the hospital.
Since I work and live a bit far from my friend, we can't meet often, but I
think we should communicate frequently via KakaoTalk and spend more time
together at church.
Your
assessment of the current situation is quite accurate. However, it is good to
clarify one thing before moving on.
👉
It is common for lethargy and depression to persist like this, even while
taking medication.
This
does not mean that "treatment is not working";
👉
it is highly likely that further medication adjustments are needed or that
there is a lack of non-pharmacological stimulation.
And as
you are now,
👉
even though we cannot meet often,
this
combination of "KakaoTalk + time at church"
can be
quite effective. As long as you set the right direction.
1. How
to Help via KakaoTalk (This is the key)
When
you are far apart, the most important thing is:
👉
“Without pressure, without interruption”
✔ Good
Patterns (Short and light, frequent)
This
kind of approach is good:
“The weather is nice
today. Did you get some fresh air?”
“Did you try walking
for just 5 minutes today? I just got back.”
“Have you had a meal?”
👉
Key Point:
Keep
questions light
An
atmosphere where a reply isn't required
✔ Even
Better Method (Mission-based)
Sometimes
like this:
“How about trying a
walk for just 5 minutes today?”
“Listen to just one
worship song and let me know how it feels.”
👉
Being small and specific is important
❌
KakaoTalk messages to avoid
“Why aren't you doing
it?” “You need to cheer up.”
“They say doing this
helps.”
👉
When you lack motivation, these phrases feel like pressure.
2.
When spending time at church (Key Points)
Spending
time together is nice, but
👉
“The atmosphere” is more important than “what you do.”
✔
Recommended methods
Sitting
together (no talking is OK)
Eating
together
A
short walk (5-10 minutes around the church)
👉
It’s okay if there is no conversation
(In
fact, comfort is more important)
✔ A
very good method
After
the service:
“Shall we walk for 5
minutes?”
👉
This actually solves three things simultaneously: exercise + emotional
stability + maintaining relationships
3.
Three Key Principles for Dealing with “People Lacking Motivation”
① Lower
Expectations
👉
“Let’s make them do well” ❌
👉
“Let’s keep things from breaking” ⭕
② Action over
Emotion
👉
Rather than “How do you feel?”
👉
“Shall we walk for 5 minutes?” ③ Continue even if there is no response
👉
Even if there is no reply
👉
It is important to keep sending light messages
4.
When it is difficult even while taking medication (Important)
You
might want to gently suggest this:
“Have you perhaps
mentioned your mood or motivation to the doctor lately?”
👉
Key Point:
“Try changing the
medication” ❌
“Have you mentioned
it?” ⭕
In
Parkinson's disease,
depression
often requires separate treatment.
5.
What you are already doing well
To be
honest, you are currently on the right track.
Not
leaving them alone
Connecting
them to church
Considering
methods
👉
This is more than half of the treatment.
6.
Realistic Expectations
To put
it a bit bluntly:
👉
Rather than expecting them to “get significantly better,” the primary goal is
to
**“hold
them back so they don’t get worse”**.
However,
if this is maintained,
👉
they will gradually improve at some point.
Finally,
(here is a short sentence)
Try
using this one sentence on KakaoTalk occasionally:
“It’s okay if you
don’t do anything special today. But you aren’t alone.”
This
👉
is not burdensome
👉
maintains the relationship
👉
and is a phrase that subtly helps you hold on.
If you
wish,
👉
I can create KakaoTalk sentences for various situations (morning/evening/when
feeling down, etc.)
👉
conversation examples that can naturally help at church
I will
make them more specific.
ok. anything if it is of help
Okay. I will provide it in a
format you can use immediately.
The key is to keep it short,
easy to use, and uninterrupted.
1. KakaoTalk Message Set (You
can copy and paste)
🌅 Morning
(Light Start)
“The
weather is nice today. It would be good to get some fresh air.”
“They
say it’s good to see just a little bit of sunlight in the morning ☀️”
“Shall
we make today a day to get moving for just 5 minutes?”
🕛 Daytime
(Action Guidance)
“By any
chance, did you walk for about 5 to 10 minutes today?” “I just went for a short
walk, and it’s better than I thought.”
“Have
you had your meal? Please eat a little, even if it doesn’t taste good.”
👉 Key
Point:
“A
sense of togetherness” (It’s important to say, “I did it too”)
🌆 Afternoon
(When you’re feeling down)
“They
say the afternoon is the time when people feel the most sluggish. Try moving
your body for just a moment.”
“It’s
okay to just play a worship song and stay still.”
“It’s
normal to have days when you don’t want to do anything.”
🌙 Evening
(Wrap-up)
“Just
getting through today is enough.”
“It’s a
success if tomorrow is even 1% better than today.”
“Please
rest comfortably. You did a great job holding on.”
💬 When
there is no reply (This is important)
“It’s
okay if you don’t reply 🙂”
“Just
leaving a greeting.”
“I was
thinking of you.”
👉 This
keeps the relationship from breaking down.
2. “Mission-based messages”
(Only 2-3 times a week)
Doing this too often can be
overwhelming.
“Today’s
Goal: Succeeding just in walking for 5 minutes is enough.”
“How
about a mission to listen to a praise song?”
“Would
you like to try going just to the front of your house and back?”
👉 Key
Point:
Small, and at a level where
failure is okay.
3. Phrases Used Naturally in
Church
Like this, without pressure:
“Shall
we sit together?”
“Let’s
have a meal together.”
“Shall
we take a walk for a moment? Just 5 minutes.”
🙏 Spiritual
Phrases (Lightweight Version)
“I
think just being together today is enough.”
“I
think even God has times when He is quiet.”
“It’s
okay if you don’t pray for a long time.”
👉 “Comfort”
instead of “Diligently”
4. Phrases to Avoid (Summary)
This is really important:
“Cheer
up.”
“Why
aren’t you doing it?” “You just need to change your mindset.”
“Pray
more.”
👉 The
intention is good, but
👉 In
the current state, it acts as pressure.
5. One small strategy (Highly
effective)
Send it like this
occasionally:
“I
didn’t want to do it today either, but I tried doing it for just 5 minutes.”
👉 This
is
Persuasion ❌
Companion ⭕
6. Final key summary
Your role is not a therapist,
👉 “Someone
who stays by their side so it doesn’t break.”
So the goal is:
Miracles ❌
Sustainability ⭕
Last sentence (once in a
while)
This is really good:
“It’s
okay if nothing special happens today. But you’re not alone.”
If you want,
👉 I
can even create a **
**KakaoTalk schedule** to send
for exactly one week, tailored to your friend’s situation.
Okay. I will create a
realistic 1-week KakaoTalk schedule for you to continue without feeling
pressured.
(1 to 2 messages a day is
enough. Too many can actually be a burden.)
📅 1-Week
KakaoTalk Schedule (Ready to Use)
🟢 Monday (Start
Lightly)
Morning
“The
weather is nice today. It would be good to get some fresh air for a moment.”
Evening
“It’s
okay if nothing special happens today. You’ve held on well.”
🔵 Tuesday
(Inducing Small Actions)
Daytime
“Shall
we try walking for just 5 minutes today?”
Evening
“I
moved around a bit today too, and it’s better than I thought.”
🟡 Wednesday (Reducing
Pressure)
Afternoon
“It’s
normal to have days when you don’t want to do anything.”
👉 (No
action inducing on this day, a day for stability)
🟣 Thursday (Very Small
Mission)
Daytime
“How
about playing just one worship song and staying still?” Evening
“Another
day has passed. That is enough.”
🟠 Friday (Maintaining
the connection)
Afternoon
“I was
thinking of you. The weather seems to have warmed up a bit lately.”
👉 (No
questions, no pressure)
🔴 Saturday
(Preparing for church)
Afternoon
“Shall
we take a short walk together at church tomorrow? Just 5 minutes.”
👉 (Specific
+ short)
⚪ Sunday
(Key day)
After the service
“It was
nice being with you today.”
Evening
“You
held out well today. Please rest comfortably.”
✔ Usage
Tips (Important)
1. Keep going even if there is
no reply
👉 This
is the key
(Not getting disconnected is
the cure)
2. Keep questions light
👉 “Did
you do it?” ❌
👉 “It
would be nice to try this” ⭕
3. “Action Induction” only 2-3
times a week
👉 Doing
it every day is burdensome
👉 Doing
it occasionally is effective
✔ Simple
actions to do together at church (for Sundays)
You just need to remember
this:
“Shall
we go for a 5-minute walk?”
“Let’s
have a meal together.”
👉 These
two are enough
✔ The
final key point
The purpose of this schedule
is
👉 not
to “bring about change”
👉 but
to “maintain a connection without breaking.”
If needed, I can also create
specific steps for the next stage:
👉 “Messages
to send when your friend feels more depressed”
👉 “Conversation
methods to naturally continue the conversation when a reply comes”
I will also help you.
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